


your ghost dancing in our home

by thoughtlessdreamer



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Grief/Mourning, mina as samo's child
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:35:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27537685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thoughtlessdreamer/pseuds/thoughtlessdreamer
Summary: A glimpse of a morning into a family of two, instead of three
Relationships: Hirai Momo & Myoui Mina, Hirai Momo/Minatozaki Sana, Minatozaki Sana & Myoui Mina
Comments: 5
Kudos: 50
Collections: #GGFLASHFIC





	your ghost dancing in our home

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the album [a crow looked at me by mount eerie](https://open.spotify.com/album/5p64XgvFREt1P6mC7Xl6XN?si=yDjSdY3kQSWhywmMQSjTJw)
> 
> go give it a listen if you want to cry :D

_‘Good morning, Satang.’_

Sana wakes up alone in a bed far too big and wide for one person to sleep in. The warm fluffy blanket that engulfs her entire body wasn’t enough to give Sana the warmth she needed—the warmth she _wanted_ . She reaches out for her phone on the bedside table, turns it on, sees the numbers _5:09_ blaring in her screen, then turns it off back again and puts it on the table.

Sana was never the type to wake up early—in fact, she sleeps like a log even if the sun was already out, demanding her to get off the bed in which she stubbornly doesn’t do. Even the multiple consecutive alarms she sets in her phone wasn’t enough to wake her up, except for that one person who was supposed to fill in the empty space beside her on the bed. Yet the thing is, she wasn’t there anymore, but had just left a wide gaping hole in Sana's chest since then.

Sana decided she should start her day early, too awake to go back to sleep and figured that she should take this as an opportunity to cook a decent meal for once, even though she doesn’t know how.

She took a 10-minute bath—too short for Sana's usual time but the quicker she gets out of the shower, the quicker she doesn’t think about _her_ —then wore a casual outfit to start her day off. Sana goes downstairs, her heavy steps echoing in the hallways bouncing off the thick walls, then goes to the kitchen without sparing a glance to the lifeless pictures hanging around in the house.

Sana decided that she'd cook a simple but decent meal: sunny side eggs and a few slices of ham. She grabs the ingredients from the fridge, pulls a pan from the cabinet, and begins to put all those ingredients she needed into the pan and starts cooking.

She leans onto the counter, patiently waiting for the food to be cooked then a vivid memory flashes right through her eyes, Sana being pulled into a scene where she was alive, where she was still breathing and laughing and _living_.

Sana remembers how Momo smiles, how she looks at Sana with so much adoration just as how she looks down at their food whenever she cooks for the both of them. Sana remembers how Momo's eyes shines whenever she was done cooking as Sana sets the table for the both of them, and how Momo's eyes literally sparkles when she eats with Sana beside her, starting light conversations between their munches that usually ends up with Sana howling in laughter and Momo snorting to the point that she spills out a few crumbs from her mouth. It was a disgusting sight to see, Sana thinks, but she loves it nonetheless.

And Sana remembers how one day, Momo was gone, _just like that_ , and she was forced to live a painful life of her other half being gone forever.

Sana snaps out from her reverie when she smells something burning and immediately remembers the eggs and ham she cooked a while back. She quickly turns it off and scans the food, hoping it wasn’t burned to the point it was unsalvageable, and fortunately for Sana, it looks okay albeit it was a little bit burnt at the edges.

_‘You're so clumsy, Satang.’_

Then the warm orange and yellow hues enter through the window and hit Sana's flawless face and her honey brown eyes, telling her that the sun has gotten up from its slumber and had finally greeted Sana back even though it was half an hour later. Sana then turns at the wall clock in the living room from where she can see it from the kitchen island, and sees the arrows pointing to _5:45_ , a sign that she should wake her daughter up to finally get ready for school.

She walks back upstairs, going to a room much farther than hers, giving a few knocks at the door before she enters.

Mina was barely snoring, her entire body, save for her little head, was covered by a humongous Pokémon blanket that one of Sana's friends had given to them as a birthday present one day—with Momo happily accepting it as if the present was for her rather than her daughter’s.

Sana walks to Mina and sits on the edge of her bed, dipping her weight as lightly as she can so that her daughter won’t wake up from the sudden presence, and tucked a few strands from Mina's face to behind her ears with the barest of touches. She looks at her one and only daughter calmly, lovingly, and the corner of her lips tugs upwards when another memory pops into her mind.

Sana remembers how Momo, eyes red of crying filled with worry for how many hours when she was with Sana in the room, had finally lit up when her daughter was given to Sana by one of the nurses, in which her tears were easily replaced with happiness.

Mina, the little angel that she is, smiles and lets out a gargle of laughter, making both Sana and Momo swell their hearts out for the new addition of their family.

Momo pokes at Mina's very _soft_ and very _fat_ cheeks, making the little baby release out another fit of giggles that made Momo and Sana melt into goo with how adorable their baby is.

Then Momo leans into the both of them, planting a soft kiss on Sana’s lips and a much softer kiss on baby Mina's head, barely felt but nonetheless had happened, and says, “I love you, the both of you.”

Baby Mina grabs one of Momo's fingers by her tiny hands in response, smiling innocently to her mother’s confession, and Momo looks at her daughter with so much endearment and affection that made Sana love Momo more then and there. “And I'll always be with you until the end.”

But the end was much shorter than anyone had expected.

Sana returns back to Mina's room when she sees Mina, who was peacefully sleeping with her light snores, had now morphed into an unpleasant frown and a furrow of her eyebrows.

“Mommy,” Mina whines, all hopeless and desperate that made Sana's already broken heart crumble much further. “Don’t go.”

Her lips quiver but it took every bit of Sana's willpower to not cry then and there, far too tired to waste her tears that could leave her emotionally exhausted so early in the morning and far too considerate to not disturb her daughter’s sleep even though she had multiple breakdowns before, right in front of her daughter, all vulnerable and weak.

Sana then decides to wake her daughter up by lightly shaking her shoulders, and since Mina was a light sleeper, she wakes up a few seconds later.

_‘Good morning, Mitang.’_

“Good morning, Mitang,” Sana greets with all the warmth in her eyes and her smile she can offer despite the coldness in her heart that had stayed within for months. “Start getting ready darling and I've already made breakfast for us.”

Mina blinks, once, twice, then rubs the sleepiness away. With one last yawn and a stretch of her limbs, she faintly nods to her mother's request and drags herself to the bathroom, sneaking a quick peck to her mother’s cheek as her way of saying good morning.

Mina was a girl with few words, mostly nodding and shaking her head whatever her parents told her—how their day goes and the little compliments inserted between conversations, sometimes out of randomness. But her actions were very much louder and larger than her small frame, a love language that she got from Momo that made Sana reminisce back when she first met her soulmate at 5 years old; shy, timid, but offers Sana a strawberry juice every lunch as her way of making her first friend, and soon to be her girlfriend, and finally her wife.

Once Sana hears the click of Mina’s bathroom door locked, she goes downstairs and sets up the table—placing the eggs and ham on a plate, rice put in a bowl, plates with utensils set for two, and two glasses of cold orange juice—then rests back on the couch in the living room as she waits for her daughter.

It was a quiet cozy morning, with the warm rays of the sun entering the house through the unblinded windows, and Sana basked in its glow of what the morning could offer.

And Sana remembers—no, _sees_ —as how Momo, around this time in the morning, would connect her phone to a wired speaker back when they first got the house and when Mina hadn’t entered into their lives yet, and presses the shuffle button in her playlist without a second thought.

Then Momo dances, each move that matches with the beat and the tempo of the song and each action seamlessly connecting to the next, all without much thought and just letting her body dance freely without constraints.

Sana would sometimes join in, other times Momo drags her with her, and there are also times where Sana would just watch and give her undivided attention and enjoy the performance her wife shows, but in the end, Sana learns and relearns like a bullet aiming straight at her heart how amazing Momo really is, and how lucky Sana is to love her and is equally loved by her in return.

And when Mina came into their lives and had soon joined with her mother’s love for dancing, a solo performance in the morning had become a duo, sometimes a trio if Sana joined in the fun too, and they would all laugh and sway their hips to Momo’s playlist coming from that Bluetooth speaker.

But the scene Sana sees quickly fades into a barely lit room that smells of antiseptic and a few chemicals that Sana doesn’t recognize, and the morning hearty beats were muted into a somber beep of a machine. And lying before her is Momo, her fleshy toned skin reduced into dangling bones, the color of her skin turned ghostly white, and glassy eyes that could barely see a thing except that light in the end of the tunnel.

Then the beeping stopped and was replaced with a constant blank line.

Just like she is now in their lives—dead.

Sana snaps back to her living room when she hears the soft pads of Mina’s footsteps descending on the stairs and immediately goes to the dining table to take a seat—her expression in a constant state of calmness despite the turbulence between her ribs.

Mina puts her bag on the couch before she runs off to the dining table where Sana propped her up since she was still too short to reach for the chair by herself.

Sana puts an egg and a slice of ham to Mina’s plate before she puts the rest on her own, then feeds her with the sounds of the _choo-choo_ of the train and the _whoosh_ of the airplane, alternating feeding herself and her daughter beside her.

Mina was very much capable of feeding herself since she had already learned how to use the utensils properly and the appropriate table manners despite her short limbs. But Momo and Sana spoil her—loves to spoil her—and the both of them take turns to shower their daughter with so much affection and love that makes Cupid jealous.

But Momo was gone now, and it was now Sana's responsibility to fill in her wife's spot to the point that there was no difference on how much love Mina receives, and because Mina deserves more and everything and nothing less than that.

When the both of them were done eating, Sana put the now empty dishes on the sink and decided that she would clean them later once she returned back to the house.

Sana turns to Mina with one of her warm smiles. “You ready?” she asks.

In which Mina meekly nods and holds onto Sana's free hand.

And as the both of them leave the house, Sana by the door with the keys on her hand and Mina closely behind her waiting for her mother to lock the house with her grip on the sling of her bag, Sana lets out one last look to the empty house before her.

“行ってきます. ( _I’m going._ )” Sana says and finally closes the door, locked, and reaches out for Mina's hand, walking their way towards their car.

And in Sana’s image, she sees the ghost of her wife standing by the door, leaning onto the wood like she usually does, and replies back to them with a warm smile and a large wave of her hand, “行ってらっしゃい! ( _See you later!_ )”

**Author's Note:**

> i honestly feel numb as i write this so i cant exactly tell how angsty or heartbreaking this fic really is in my perspective (if it really is angst)
> 
> nonetheless, feedback is greatly appreciated even if its a ton of heartbreaking emojis or a sad face and dont be afraid to criticize me since i like to learn from my mistakes or things i could have done better
> 
> thank you for reading!


End file.
